NFL Week: A Fantasy Win, A Bengals Win

by Kevin Burton

   It’s Sunday and the now-hated Cleveland Browns are about to increase their lead over Kansas City.

   They call a running play and there is a bit of a scrum near the goal line. My three-word thought: “get in there!”

   Why would I do a thing like that, root for Cleveland. Was I backsliding?

   Well the ball was in the hands of Kareem Hunt, and Hunt is on my family’s fantasy football team.  Hunt scored, we scored, simple as that. Kansas City would just have to find another way to win.  And hey, they did!

   To my credit, I did restrain myself from cheering out loud for Hunt.

   So this is the madness of fantasy football. It’s my wife telling me the Chiefs had scored but my asking, “But how did they score? Who got the touchdown?”

    It’s like having a Soviet Union left wing on a hockey fantasy team (because the Soviet Union didn’t have right wings, only left wings, get it ha, ha!) having him score against the US, but the US winning anyway.

   Want more football heresy?  Trailing by less than one fantasy point going into the Monday night game, I was left rooting for two Baltimore Ravens, quarterback Lamar Jackson and running back Ty’Son Williams to do something good against my other former team the Raiders.

   Somehow it all worked out. Our fantasy team, the K&J Silvers, won its debut 110 to 77.

   What’s more, my real team with no offensive line, Cincinnati, beat Minnesota in overtime 27-24. What a weekend!

   But in the sunshiny glow of the aftermath, dark clouds, looming on the horizon.  (Can’t you just here John Facenda from NFL Films reading that last sentence?).

   Next week’s fantasy matchup pits the Silvers, who won with 110 points, against a team that lost with 160 points.  I’m guessing both teams could emerge with .500 records on the young season.

   Texted my brother, a fantasy nut with six teams, that I should quit and go out on top.

   “Uh, no!” was the response.

   “It’s all in fun” says Silvers team CEO and wife Jeannette. 

   I wasn’t aware that Yahoo would generate a “game recap” after each game, as if fantasy football were a real thing.  This recap is sponsored by Snickers.  So after you read this post, go out and get some Snickers!

   Here is the recap.

   “While they ranked only 10th in the league in points scored for the week, K&J Silvers came back for a 110.10-77.02 victory over killer bulls.”

   “After trailing 77.02-76.70 heading into Monday night, K&J Silvers roared back behind Ty’Son Williams (65 rush yards, 1 rush TD, 29 receiving yards) and Lamar Jackson (235 pass yards, 1 pass TD, 86 rush yards).

   “Dak Prescott (26.42 points) and Antonio Gibson (11.8) carried the flag for killer bulls in the loss. K&J Silvers (1-0) will look to keep it rolling against MVP 2002, while killer bulls (0-1) will meet Russell’s Rookies in an effort to get some positive momentum.”

   Scroll down the page a bit and you get this other nugget from Yahoo:

    “It’s simple math, K&J Silvers. The more leagues you join, the more chances you have to win. Check out Pro Pick’em and sign up today!”

   My even simpler math tells me the more leagues I join, the more chances I have to lose and the more precious time I sink into a pretend competition.

   You may hear me singing a different tune however, if I make some personnel changes and the Silvers actually linger in the middle of the standings instead of sinking to the bottom as expected. 

   Drafting the Ravens’ Williams was a fairly good move, after starting running back J. K. Dobbins was injured and lost for the season. I also have Chicago’s Justin Fields as a backup quarterback, because he’s likely to be starting for the Bears soon.

   Have to think about what to do with my Green Bay players, wideout Davonte Adams and kicker Mason Crosby, if the Packers continue to stink like they did Sunday.    Hey wait a minute, do I already sound like one of them, one of those fantasy nuts?

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