by Kevin Burton
The Page 7 blog publishes five days a week, usually, and almost every time I post it, I tease it (verb) on Facebook.
A tease (noun) is like a little commercial. Mine are two or three-sentence previews that I write to try to get people interested in reading it.
So the other day I’m in the file I use to write those teases and I notice the most recent tease there reads “blah, blah, blah, on the Page 7 bog….”
So I’m like, oops, did I actually tease “Page 7 bog”? Did that go out? More than once? And if so, did anybody notice?
Maybe you are a super-sophisticated city slicker and you don’t know what a bog is. But you do know the term “bogged down.” That’s a bad thing. Stuck in the mud. Spinning its wheels. Like music playing on the wrong speed. A slooooooow speed. Uncool.
You know what is cool, or cool-sounding at least? The bayou! Way cool, right? Anything Credence ever sang about the bayou made me want to go there, dress sharp and bring a date.
The tour bus is tuned up, gassed and ready. It’s your choice, your call. You going to the bog or the bayou?
Oh my God, Page 7 bog….
This is a bog, according to Merriam-Webster:
“Geography: wet spongy ground, especially a poorly-drained usually acid area rich in accumulated plant material, frequently surrounding a body of open water, and having a characteristic flora (as of sedges, heaths, and sphagnum).”
And as a verb:
“bogged; bogging, transitive verb: to cause to sink into or as if into a bog: impede, mire,—usually used with down
“intransitive verb: to become impeded or stuck —usually used with down
And in British English one definition is “the lavatory.” \
“Spongy?” Not a good description for one’s blog. And “the lavatory, the bathroom?” Wish I hadn’t seen that one.
Blog, bog. There are typos and then there are typos!
Like the time I was chatting with a woman online and in my innocence asked, “Are you busy?” but with my fat index finger accidentally inquired, “Are you busty?” instead.
Hey the T is right next to the Y! I mis-hit the keys. It’s an honest mistake! Get off me, man!
Not sure which is worse, “are you busty,” or “Page 7 bog.”
“Bayou” according to the dictionary is:
“a creek, secondary watercourse, or minor river that is tributary to another body of water’ or “any of various usually marshy or sluggish bodies of water.”
So maybe that’s not a whole lot more inviting than bog if you’re reading the dictionary. But there is nothing sluggish about a Credence tune.
Bayou has a much better vibe, much better PR, you know? A bog is just not a good time. How can I ever recover from this?
“Everything happens for a reason” my brother is wont to say. So maybe I was supposed to make that typo(graphical error). Maybe in this brand-new year I’m supposed to be evaluating anew whether this blog is really a bog in disguise. “Did anybody notice?” maybe is the best question of all.
Or maybe I just really, really needed to laugh out loud (for a change) as I did when I discovered my error.
You know something else? You can have a very good normal life, live long and prosper, to coin a phrase, without knowing the difference between transitive and intransitive verbs. But if you do know the difference, you know which verbs are sexy and which ones are not. Am I wrong?
And that’s the essential difference. That’s the edge you need, to dig Creedence, and the Page 7 blog.
Page 7 